I found an article online and I thought it was interesting. A nurse recorded the most common regrets of the dying and put her findings into a book called ‘The Top Five Regrets of The Dying.’ Below is the list of each regret.
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
“This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.”
For a long time, I’ve lived my life in a way that I have no regrets or missed experiences (Carpe Diem). I hope that the people that know me remember me as a person that did what he wanted, when he wanted.
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”
We’ll I don’t know what to say about this one, I’m naturally guilty -it’s in my personality to be ambitious. Perhaps it’s due to my humble beginnings, I do work hard and that will not change. We grew up with limited means, and seeing my single mother work multiple jobs, and ask for loans just to pay rent had a big effect on me. Money is important, and it don’t ever want to be a problem. I don’t have to be rich, but I must live comfortably.
Nonetheless, I do want to spend more time with my family (2 Week Notice ), and I use my family as a reason to work hard. I believe that if I manage to be financially free, I will spend more quality time with my family.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming.”
All I can say about this one is I don’t have many friends because I can’t stand the bullshit. But you know, it’s not about quantity, it’s about quality.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
“Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved.”
Ha! I always tell the people that get married, don’t forget about your friends. It seems people get married and they, for whatever reason, think that they can’t have friends anymore. Like your social life is supposed to end all of the sudden. I want my wife to have a social life, and I definitely need some social time with the friends that I have. I value my friendships, and I treat them like family.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
“Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”
I am a very happy person, however some of my ambitions sometimes bring disappointments. I don’t see these moments as a bad thing, it is a good moment for reflection. I do have to work on letting the past go and keep moving forward.